Truth on Unpredictable Days

I’m not what you would describe as a type A person, so control hasn’t been a struggle in my life. 
Or so I thought until recently . .
I’m not a structured person, although I am tempted by pretty planners &
I’m also not spontaneous, though an unplanned getaway sounds dreamy!

I prefer rhythm & predictability or admiringly known as “disguised control” .

Last week this adorable 8month old yanked control out from beneath me & flat out punched predictability in the face!
Harbor’s sleep has been erratic meaning
our rhythm has been non existent!
The days of unpredictability led to unproductive days followed by an avalanche of self centered criticism & condemnation. 

As I begrudgingly sat in stillness, attempting yet again to induce Harbor into a nap, the Father spoke :
“I see you. You’re not alone.”
& the dam broke as the Father flooded my soul with truth;
Truth that noticeably slid out of focus as I fixed my eyes on my circumstances.
➕ Truth that He is faithful. 

➕ Truth that He has carried me through difficulty & uncertainty. 

➕Truth that although I’m sleep deprived,
I’m abundantly thankful our sweet boy is home & not lying in a bed in the NICU. 

➕ Truth that although Harbor seems increasingly needy, my heart explodes with gratitude, recalling that endless week my empty arms ached to hold him!

➕ Truth that although Harbor is struggling with sleep, it’s because he’s growing mentally & physically. 

➕ Truth that I am loved as my husband graciously holds Harbor for hours during the night so that I can sleep. 

➕ Truth that these moments of childhood are more precious than predictability.
Moments which are painfully evident as our oldest talks about life & the future & my heart aches because the bittersweet truth is that these days of childhood are fleeting. 

So as the tears of selfishness flush out of my soul, tears of gratitude began streaming down my face. 
I hold Harbor close & whisper “thank you”.
Thank you for the gift of beauty, grace & Truth especially on unpredictable days. 
_____________________________________
For more grace filled encouragement like this, follow along on my FB page :  

 

beauty & grace {everyday}

Hey mama’s!
I’m so excited to finally share a bit of my heart behind the change that’s happening in this little online space..
A few years ago I was in the busy season of Barn sales, and although that season of life has ended,
I’m still just as passionate about celebrating the beauty of motherhood!

I personally believe that our homes are the most important place in earth & mama’s,
we greatly influence the atmosphere of our homes by what we believe & what we speak!!
Yet often times, meeting the demands of motherhood finds us empty because we prioritize everything except our own souls. Over time, we can loose sight of the big picture & completely overlook the beauty filled life we’ve each been given!

See I’m that girl who repeatedly stumbles when I try to stand on my own strength &
who often despairs when I forget Faith is choosing to declare all He is rather than all we see.

In this new space you’ll find me
#preachingtomyself & prioritizing a #wholehealthylifestyle
because I believe we can have healthy minds + live whole lives

You’ll find me attempting too find
#purposefulperspective & see the
#extraordinaryinmyordinary

I’ll also post snippets of our family’s personal journey of #homeschoolingwithbeautyandgrace

Hear this!
I am not a perfect mom; I don’t have a perfect home or perfect kids or the perfect curriculum.
I’m daily.walking.proof of the need to
#declaretruthinyourtrial
to choose + purposefully walk in {beauty & grace}everyday

You won’t find formula’s here or a step by step guide to self improvement .. nope!
Just encouragement, hope & truth.
A place where real life & real struggles find real grace.

I hope you'll join me over on Facebook  // Let’s feed our souls mama!!

Truth for my Child

Our first official week of the 2016/17 school year is almost complete.
This week we gently eased back into school mode.
 I held a loose idea of what our days would look like, and we certainly had struggles,
but the Father planned for something lovely.

Earlier this week, I lay tossing and turning, not over curriculum, but with a strong stirring upon my heart.

 A stirring of what truly matters most in our day to day.

 
My heart begin to well up with the enormity of the daily opportunity I've been given as a mom
to speak life over my children. To declare the truth to them.

Truth that they might often not believe. 

Truth that they the world has lied to them about.

Truth of who they are; not based on actions, but a child their Father has redeemed them as.

I awoke the next morning, penning words from the Father;

You are righteous, not b/c of actions, but simply b/c you believe.

You are my child; my son, my daughter.

You are royalty and have the complete inheritance as my child.

You can never disinherit all that I've given you. You are not in lack.

I have provided and will continually, abundantly provide more than you can imagine!

You are unconditionally loved, no matter what you do, or how much you mess up.

You are NOT a disappointment.

My arms are continually open toward you.

When you feel distance, turn around, you'll see Me. I am never far from you.

I will never leave, never turn aside.

I am always perusing you, always longing for you. 

I am your Shepherd.

When you fall, when you're wounded and cannot walk,

I will carry you close to my heart, so you hear my heartbeat toward you.

Your falling does not anger me; You are pleasing! 

Not b/c of how you act, how you look, or what you say.

You are mine and I delight in you!

When I look at you, I see a clean and spotless child b/c of the priceless blood which paid for your righteousness.

I love you when you are unlovable. 

I am your Father, standing with open arms, welcoming you my child.

I've prepared a wondrous feast, I've put the finest clothes on your back.

All of my kingdom is yours, simply b/c you.are.mine." 

Teach them Diligently

In only a short time, my teenagers and I will be at Teach them Diligently Nashville. 

We've attended this event for the past three years and it has been such a sweet time of refreshment and encouragement.
 

This beautiful chalk print, which I received from the conference, sits on my dryer and is a daily encouragement to my heart. 

Teach them Diligently hosts conventions in multiple cities each year.

 The Nashville convention is held in the massive and gorgeous Opryland Hotel and Convention Center. 

It's simply stunning!

Our children absolutely love the fountains and water show, the boat ride and the luscious landscaping!
                  {attempting to photograph inside the hotel at night, however, is a huge challenge for me}

By nature, I don't tend to enjoy large crowds, and the mere thought of a convention can quickly leave me feeling overwhelmed. Yet, even the gigantic vendor hall, crowds of people by the hundreds,

 and numerous stacked sessions to choose from,

 the Father gently directs my path to peace, and navigates the weekend, so I walk away feeling refreshed.

If I were chatting with you over coffee, the encouragement I'd give you in person would be,

Begin with prayer

Pray about attending in the first place, pray about your spouse and/or children attending,

pray about your lodging, travel, finances, and your childcare situation.

 Pray about which sessions to attend, pray for God ordained encounters with individuals 

and ultimately that His peace reign in your heart throughout the weekend.

:: Once you feel the Father's direction in all those areas, secure your arrangements.

This can take quite a bit of time, as you may need to plan for travel, book a hotel room, 

research local sites you may want to visit during your stay, food arrangements, etc...

:: Print the speaker session schedule and prayerfully listen to the Spirit's direction regarding which to attend.

Personally, this is a fluid process. While I'm reading the descriptions, and planning which to attend,

the Father had re-directed my sight and heart to another session I hadn't planned on.

AND even once I'm at the conference, I continue to listen to His guidance.

  {Don't fret over not being able to hear all the sessions you'd ultimately like to hear,
You can purchase individual sessions on MP3}

"The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps" Proverbs 16:9

:: Lastly, I look over the vendor list and again, prayerfully decide which curriculum purchases I need to make and/or which curriculum I'll want to research in person.

You can find Teach them Diligently on FB and they're downloadable app can assist with planning as well.

Our Father is a good, good Father who longs to reveal paths which lead to life.

Be encouraged, a convention of this magnitude may seem like overwhelming chaos, but He calms that storm

He leads, He guides, He directs, and He makes beauty surround.
..............................................................................................................................................

You can keep in touch with Elizabeth and receive truth filled encouragement for your mom heart over at Beauty and Grace {everyday}.  

abide

{"I have no greater joy than to know that my children walk in the truth" ~ 3 John 1:4}

 
God created my children for His  purposes.
They are distinctly created with gifts and passions. Passions that often times I misjudge as character flaws.
Of course, there certainly are habits like thinking of others, cultivating thoughtfulness, etc.. that I try to be intentional with.

My deep heart's desire is to lead them to the source of truth.
To abide in constant relationship with The Father; to hear his heartbeat, His voice, His Spirit.

 One of my greatest desires is for my kids to know that I'm on their side, that I'm for them!
 When I look deeply in their eyes, greet them happily in the morning, make big deals over the things that are a big deal to them, actively listen, cheer them on, truly try to see life through their eyes


... all these desires that I'm pouring out on them, are but a snippet of the true nature of the Father's heart toward them. 

Yes, those desires to train them and guide them will still be there...but they aren't guiding my days.
When I see character flaws, they aren't overwhelming my spirit. They aren't burdens on my back.
When my mind is reminded of this, I abide in rest. My soul is at rest.
My eyes see the beauty. My heart embraces their passions. I rest because they're in the Fathers hands.

  He loves them so so abundantly!! He is for them!! He longs to lead them into all truth!

"how do you do it all?!" part 2 {truth}

                                         "Truly my soul finds rest in God alone." ~ Psalm 62:1       
                       "You will know the Truth, and the Truth will set you free." ~ John 8:32  

Knowing the truth, {{truly knowing the truth...in my heart AND mind}} about how the Father sees me

 has been the single factor in my, as well as my husband's, lifestyle of rest and completeness.

You may wonder, "How does understanding the Father's love have anything to do with parenting?"

                                             It has absolutely everything. to. do. with. it!!

                                     

Knowing who I am and how He sees me, affects how I walk, how I talk, how I act. 

Every action comes from the well spring of truth within my heart!  

Either I live out my days based on the enemy's lie or the Father's truth.

Walking in truth brings freedom, and freedom spills over into my entire life, including parenting.

                                           

                             
                                              So how do I know the truth? Simply by listening!
            I listen to His voice of Truth, His Spirit which bears witness to the Truth... the Truth that
                                 "I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus." ~ 2 Cor. 5:21
                                                  

"I am qualified. worthy. righteous. whole. complete. lacking nothing. full of love and patience. gentle. beautiful. encouraging. creative...etc...Because of what Jesus did"  

 Not an ounce of my self...but completely because of His complete, finished work;

When I begin to doubt, or fear creeps in; when I begin to look to my self or my efforts,

His voice of truth reminds me,

 "It's all because of Jesus.  He has made me the beautiful, beautiful righteousness!"

                                           

As I sit and listen to Him tell me who I am, my soul is full of life. abundant, overflowing life!

                                         {{ right believing = produces right living.}}

"how do you do it all?" part 1 {abide}

A while back, a sweet friend who just had her second son, asked me the question, "how do you do it all?!
I feel like there's not enough of me to give to both of my children; how do you do it with six?"

Looking back on the thirteen years of parenting that I've had, a lot has been a huge learning experience! I certainly didn't feel the least bit qualified to give her an ounce of parenting advice. My reply was simply,

                                                            "only with Him."  

                 "I simply cannot do it on my own. I am nothing. I am totally dependent on Him to do it"

                             "I wasn't enough for one child; I'm not enough for six. but Him!"

         "He is faithful. He's given me these children and with Him, through Him I am able.

                            on my own, in my own strength, I fall. I fail miserably. daily."

          

There are days that I fall short connecting on a deep level with my kids. There are days that I'm impatient. There are days that I'm self focused and not a loving friend to my husband. There are days that I'm sidetracked by things of this world, that shouldn't come before my family.

My hearts desire is to soak in each and every moment. to love abundantly. to love purposefully. 
                                     but nothing in my own strength can make that happen!!

While that may sound a bit depressing, knowing {deep}in my hearts core that the Father is the only One who can and will accomplish all my hearts desire is completely and overwhelmingly liberating!!

{not only will He accomplish my hearts desire; He has plans {{abundantly}} more than I even desire!}

                           To think that I can "do it" {whatever it is} is a complete lie!!
          sure i can certainly try on my own strength, and even produce limited, momentary results
                                                                        OR
              I can {let Him} work. He, who has the ability to change hearts and give true change.    
                             

continually, moment by moment, day in and day out listening to Him, resting in His love and goodness
                                              "is the only way I can do it".
 

{parenting with freedom}

Boys! If you've got 'em, then you will know what this post is all about! actually, this post isn't gender specific.
I suppose it's just child specific.

Early in our parenting years, Ben and I, unknowingly parented quite rigid. We were determined to have perfect little miniature adults. You know, not the kids who cry in a restaurant...nope. not ours. 
                           not the kids who threw temper tantrums. nope, we'd put a stop to those.

                   not the kids who were sneaky. nope, they would willingly obey our every request.

                                              11 years and 5 boys later {and a little perfect sweet pea}...

We've thrown our perfectionist, unrealistic, controlling views to the wind. The Father has softened our hearts and opened our eyes to a spirit led "whatever you have for this child" plan. It's such freedom!

Children are individualistic and we desperately need to hear what the Father has for each of them, instead of suffocating them with our own self preserved image. Basking in the freedom of the Father has completely freed our hearts to bestow grace on others, especially our children.
When a certain little guy sneaks downstairs after he's already been tucked in bed; Ben and I can smile at each other, grab up our little stinker and smoother him in kisses, then send him back to bed.
If our firstborn would have ever thought to pull this trick, he would have been greeted with firmness, not grace. I'm certainly not condoning disobedience or disrespect. We've realized that they.are.children.
They will act like children. That includes childish behavior, which is not a reflection on us, as parents.

                           Harsh law without their heart at the center only breeds contempt. 

{Don't believe the lie}

More days than I'd like, I find myself listening to a sneaky lie that sounds a bit like this...

"Your not patient enough, not kind enough, not encouraging enough."

 "You don't exercise enough, You don't cook well enough, You don't laugh enough, listen enough"... 

         Yes, reality may look messy, reality may be hard, some days are tough, some days I'm weary.

My kids get crazy; they run through the house; they jump on the couch; I yell just to be heard...

                                      Mothering can be exhausting; physically and mentally.

Living by faith isn't what my eyes see or how I feel.

 I don't want to waste my life striving to be good enough... I want to rest in the truth that in Him
                                  I am complete. nothing lacking. nothing incomplete.

                                             
   {Life is so much more than our daily circumstance and truth is not dependent on my actions.}

{a introspective look}

December was lovely, absolutely lovely! We soaked in our family's first Christmas with a sweet little girl!! . Celebrating the joy of the season surrounded by children deeply warms my heart!

January is almost over and I sit here, pondering, and while I type, I wait for the Spirit to reveal the truth.

                                                      

                                                              

A few days after Christmas, our fourth son turned five years old. He wanted to go bowling; we had such a great time! Sweet Pea behaved wonderfully, the boys ate pizza, I won a game, and I don't have a single picture of this special day. This makes me sad!  

January comes along, and we celebrate our firstborn son's birthday. Currently he asks me almost every year to make him a treasure hunt, so that he can search for his gifts. I hide clues in some great places; brothers don't hesitate to help him out.

 I don't have a single picture of the moment.

I know someday I'll forget the details of these days, which is why I treasure how a photo captures that moment in time. 

When it comes to capturing the moments with photos, I feel like I fail miserably.

As I struggle with these feelings, I hear a quiet truth...

                                     "you're their mom. appointed for them. be present"

In spite of the lack, I'm still a work in progress; the Father is continually transforming me into the mom He's destined me to be. Yes I fail. I'll keep trying with Him guiding my steps.

I've been thinking about some of my dear friends, you know, those friends that "have it all together".

                                       the friend who bakes from scratch and has a herb garden.

                                  the friend who is an amazing, devoted home school teacher/ mom.

                                    the friend who is in great shape and has the perfect figure.

                                                  the friend who has a spotlessly clean home.
 
                                                    the organized, crafty / blogger mom.

               all these moms seem to have time for everything that I endlessly struggle to make time for.

That's when the Spirit whispers again, "stop listening to the Lie". 

That sneaky Lie which starts off cloaked with good intention, disguised as innocent motivation, then wearily loads heaps of condemnation.

See all this time that I'm looking at my good intentions along with my shortcoming, I'm forgetting who I am in Christ. My focus has completely shifted from abiding in Him, which is where I experience true joy, contentment, peace and resting in Him.

"Instead of looking at your circumstances, your inadequacies, your shortcomings, turn away from them and keep your eyes on Jesus! 

Like this verse clearly says, when my focus in completely on Him, I'm transformed into His likeness!

 "But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as the Spirit of the Lord." ~ 2 Corinthians 3:18
                        
                             Let's look at JESUS and be Christ occupied, instead of self occupied.